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The anxious attacher shows their distress, they wear their heart on their sleeve, so you can see when they’re anxious or struggling. But the avoidant attacher keeps their cards close to their chest. They rarely show their distress because they’ve learned from childhood that no one will comfort them, and therefore it’s too risky to show it. A study by Main and Solomon (1986) found that avoidantly attached children are actually more sensitive to their relationship with their caregiver than anxious

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